Crystal Diaper Magic 1

Lily didn’t see the point of Math class. Well, not all Math classes universally, she didn’t feel remotely qualified to make such a sweeping claim. Somewhere out there could be a future Robert Oppenheimer or Mileva Maric who is seeing their first isosceles triangle and furiously scribbling in their notebook the first figures in a formula that will completely change the way humanity views the laws of reality, and that will ultimately carry us to the stars and all of the wonders contained therein—but that person was not Lily. And that class was not Mister Shigeki’s Intro to Differential Equations. Oh well. At least he was nice to look at, even if his accent was unexpected. She had always thought Scottish brogues were supposed to be sexy, but his just felt frustrating. Then again, the gods don’t give with both hands.

As she began dissecting why that idiom doesn’t translate to polytheistic beliefs, a nub of pink chalk bounced off her forehead. Mister Shigeki had hit her right between the eyes from across the room, and now stood leaning against Marissa Adam’s desk in the front row. His beard was perfectly manicured to compliment his jawline, and the smirk on his face betrayed his frustration.
“Miss Celeste. I don’t suppose you can tell me the answer to the question on the board?”
Lily blinked several times as she processed his request. Her eyes darted to the question on the board and she sighed. There weren’t even any numbers in it, just random letters representing imaginary ones. “You know what Mister Shigeki? I really can’t. But it’s my fault, I thought this was going to be a Math class. If I realized this was linguistics I would have brought my other notebook.” She punctuated the last word by picking up the little red notebook and tapping it on her desk for affect.

A murmur of exasperated snickers rustled amongst her classmates and Mister Shigeki rubbed his eyes with his eyes with his thumb and forefinger. “If you don’t plan on paying attention, why don’t you just go home early?”

Lily raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t you supposed to teach me?”

“You can’t teach someone who doesn’t want to be taught. I have fifty minutes three times a week to teach a first year Math class to a room of students the majority of whom do not care. If you decide that you want to get caught up, my office hours are always open. But I don’t need you setting precedent for people day-dreaming and getting away with it.” He paused. “Although I suppose half of the room only shows up to ogle you while you’re staring off into the void.

Blood flushed to Lily’s cheeks, but the rest of the class was busy either grumbling indignantly of stifling laughter. She blacked out for a moment, and the next thing she knew she was standing outside the door to the Math room with her backpack slung over one shoulder. She started down the hallway to the stairs, feeling extremely self-conscious about how short her skirt was.
She threw the front door of the STEM building open with both hands and galloped out into the sun, her ballet flats clicking on the pavement as she did. Lily hated everything about the STEM building, how stiflingly warm it was, how the third and fourth years seemed to linger everywhere like Gollum looking for a fish—she prided herself on how quickly she could get out of it. After such a mildly embarrassing experience she needed to not be around anyone, let alone leering engineering students. Thankfully the University campus was built alongside a dense greenbelt, and she made for the trees. While the edge of the trees was a popular hang-out spot for students, walking just ten minutes into the scratchy underbrush and decomposing autumn leaves virtually guaranteed her solitude. To her, the smell damp detritus was comforting.

She kept walking until she couldn’t see any sign of the campus through the woods before finally leaning against a tree. Lily carefully lowered herself down onto one of its roots and took a deep breath. She thought back to what Mister Shigeki said. She didn’t want to be there. That was about all she did know. Halfway into her first semester of University and she still had no idea what she wanted to study, as well as having befriended a paltry two people: Marissa Adams from the Math class after she lent the other girl a pencil on the first day prior to moving to the back of the classroom; and Lily’s assigned roommate, Annie.

Realistically, Annie was the only reason she had not dropped out yet. She actually felt like she could trust the other girl. Annie was in her second year and she had the confidence to show it. She had her whole daily schedule planned out, which fit into a weekly schedule, which fit into a monthly schedule, which fit into her five year plan. She colour-coded everything too, and prepared her meals in advance. She prepared her meals in advance! Lily didn’t even feel like an adult most days, and next to Annie she felt like a gods damned toddler.

A noise nearby drew Lily’s attention. It sounded like a rabid housecat, then a desperate squeaking. She got to her feet and slowly slunk towards it, holding her bag in front of her as a shield. She peered around a tree into a clearly. A white rabbit with little purple wings was slowly backing up into a tree trunk, having been cornered by some kind of black lynx. The winged rabbit looked injured and terrified. The wildcat coiled as if it was about to pounce, and before she could so much as think Lily broke from cover and hurled her bag at it and prayed the weight of her Math book would be enough to scare the creature off.

The bag struck with a heavy thud that knocked the cat off its paws and Lily shouted at it as she moved towards the rabbit. She still didn’t know what prompted her to act. She had never heard of a winged rabbit, so it was probably an endangered species and she couldn’t have extinction on her conscience. Her eyes went from the rabbit to the lynx and she froze. It had three eyes. Three red, angry eyes. And maybe it was because she was closer to it, but it seemed a lot bigger now. Panther big. Lily imposed herself between the ever-growing cat and the injured rabbit, wishing she still had her shield-backpack to maybe buy her thirty seconds more of life.

“You are the one I’ve been looking for.”

“Wha—“

The voice was coming from inside her head, and despite the danger of her present situation it filled her with courage. A brilliant light erupted from the rabbit and she turned her head just in time to see it leap towards her. At the same time the enormous wildcat pounced at her. As the rabbit made contact she was enveloped by light and an invisible force erupted forth from her body and the wildcat was blasted away from her like a shot from a cannon.

In her mind Lily saw a pink crystal star encapsulated by a green gem. She saw the star inside her own chest, in her heart, and felt power flow out from it and into her, transforming her. The light faded and Lily was left in the clearing. Her skirt and blouse had been transformed into low-cut tutu-like uniform with a bright purple blow emblazoned on her chest, with matching bows now tied into her hair. Her ballet flats had similarly been changed into knee-high boots, her knee socks had become pale pink thigh highs, and elbow-length frilly gloves had manifested on her arms. A weighty scepter with a pink star atop it was in her hand. But in all of this, the part of her outfit Lily noticed first was what had appeared between her legs: an impossibly large pink diaper, complete with bows and frills that matched the rest of her outfit. The padding was so thick that it descended to halfway down her thighs, and the frills of her new skirt did nothing to hide it. But she had no time to question the ensemble as an enraged yowl from across the clearing reminded her of her predicament. The wildcat pounced again, but this time she reacted faster—faster than she ever thought possible. Lily hopped aside and the three-eyed beast buried its claws into the tree roots in the spot she had stood a moment before. Moving on instinct more than anything else, she thrust her star scepter towards the beast and pink and green light erupted from it. The cat yowled again, but this time in pain as it was thrown into a tree trunk. It hit with a crack and it slumped to the forest floor.

Lily stood her ground, not dropping her guard for a moment as she watched the cat’s furious red eyes. It blinked at her as it breathed slowly. Then its form began to change, the heavy black fur seeming to fade away into smoke. All that was left were the three glowing eyes, and then they were gone too.

Lily sighed. Then she re-examined her new outfit. What the Hell was going on? And how was she supposed to get back to residence?